On change

About two months ago, I was sitting in my favorite pub when realized one of my favorite bartenders was leaving to move to the interior. I had been away for some time. Before I even asked where she was going, or why she was leaving, I stated, “Good for you. Change is good.”

A writer friend of mine overheard, he reprimanded me for being so cliché. He stated (and I am paraphrasing here as I cannot remember his exact words) that as a future writer, I should not fall for such apparent notions, but that I should question every, and not jump to the mundane, obvious remarks.

His comments stung me. It hurt because the remark came from someone I consider a peer. At the time, I remained quiet. However, on review, I see that he did not understand where I was coming from and how I perceive change.

To me, change is inevitable. One cannot prevent change, just as one cannot stop the sun from shining on sunny days, nor the rain from falling on rainy days. Change is going to occur, either by fate or by choice. To me, change is part of life.
I have had so much change in my life that if I were to write every event down on paper, I would fill volumes of tomes. I have learned two things about change: to go with the flow and see where it leads and to accept it for what it is and just struggle through it.

As someone with a mild disability, I am used to struggling to get what I want. I was unfazed by the notion of change as others might be. Some people call this “brave.” (I heard that a lot as the only kid I knew with a disability in the hood that I knew. I never liked the term and I found it disturbing. I was not brave. I was just trying to do what others did. I was a kid. I just wanted what every other kid wanted, to fit in). The point is that changed never bothered me.

I guess, ultimately, that when it comes to change, I am pragmatic about it. Thus, it led me to utter such a trite statement to my bartender friend.
—Robert Confiant 10 April 2016 (mod 24 March 2016)

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