Pickup line or compliment?

“You have beautiful eyes.”

“You have a wonderful smile.”

We all have features, which draw others attention to ourselves. Some even opine them in their pickup lines. I am one such person, or I was; until, I settled down.

For me, it’s a person’s eyes; I often use the line: “You have beautiful <colour of eyes> eyes. I cannot not help it. It is the first thing that draws me to someone. It’s primal.

The next thing I notice is the smile (if the person smiles).

On many occasions, I been told that I have a nice smile, or that I have a good laugh.

Of course, we all know these to be only physical aspects to a person; their beauty of a short time; they are material and temporal, of the moment. They cannot last.

They say that, “The eyes are a window to the soul.” If this is true, I get a glance at who a person is at first eye contact.

The physical is okay, if all one wants is a quick one-on-one session, or friendship based on looks. What keeps one interested is the other’s personality, and the other’s interests and likes. Are there commonalities, or differences, which draw one in? These are the stuff of real friendships and love.

The problem with using physical compliments as ice breakers is that they can be misconstrued, as a pickup line when in-fact it was meant to be a complement.

I have had this happen to me on a few occasions, when what I meant was a compliment; the person did in-fact have nice eyes, or a nice smile. Where nothing else other than the compliment was meant. This was the issue while trying to make new friends in bars, where I met most of my friends when I first moved to Vancouver.

No, often, these compliments were taken as pickup lines (Don’t get me wrong if I wanted to pickup a guy at the bar, I used these as lines too). So, some can take this both way, and I can’t blame them.
—Robert Confiant 12 August 2017 (mod 27 March 2018)



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