I am working on it

I have lost fourteen pounds since Christmas. It isn’t as awesome as it seems. I lost eight pounds in the first two weeks, and then I plateaued for over a month.

My brother was in town a little over a week ago and he commented on my weight gain (my heaviest weight ever; shamelessly to admit). I told him, “I am warning on it and that I lost eight pounds.”

I want to do things differently this time. I have lost count how many times I’ve tried to lose weight. Diets work for a while, but then I go back to my old habits. I am striving for a lifestyle change and new habits by cutting down on portion sizes, eating more vegetables, and true social drinking (and not what I previously considered social drinking. But if I want one or two drinks a week, then I will. So far, I haven’t wanted one).

It’s working. I have lost another six pounds. According to the Body-Mass Index (BMI), I am morbidly obese. I don’t believe one should go NY the BMI scale. I think realistically, one should carry ten to fifteen pounds above what the BMI states (in case, one gets sick. But more so, because it’s more realistic, I am 56 yo, I don’t care how old one is, I know 140 to 145 lbs is never going to happen besides 155 to 160 is more realistic weight, but at my age, I will settle for 170 to 175 lbs.

In any event, because I am not dieting, it will take a long time to get there and that’s okay. It took a long time to pack it on, so it’s going to take a long time to take it off. It’s about lifestyle and habit changes and these take time. Besides, I am bound to slip every once in a while; it’s human nature. The thing is not to fret, or quit just because one screws up once in a while (something I have done in the past.

Life’s a journey. I will keep you posted.

—Robert Confiant 7 February 2019

Got to keep moving

It’s seven o’clock in the morning and the sun is rising. It’s near the end of January, so I think this is probably standard for this time of year. I never noticed before, so I cannot say otherwise. Whether it is, or is not, it is nice to observe.

It’s a brisk morning though and one can feel the chill in the air. I like it. I find that the colder air is also the freshest air. I found this to be true wherever I lived. Although, I only lived in two provinces and three cities. But I would think, discussing this with others, it is much the same anywhere in Canada. It was why I enjoyed shoveling snow as often as I did when I was much younger and in my twenties. I liked the cold fresh air that winter brought that’s a strange think I know for one to enjoy shoveling so much. But I did.

By shoveling snow, I discovered that it gave me time to reflect on the day, or how I was doing or feeling. It was good exercise too. I felt tired but re-energized too (exercise does that – it revitalizes you). When I used to workout in the gym, I would hit the zone. I was tired, but I would get in the groove and I found I enjoyed exercising.

Unfortunately, those days are gone. On cold and/or wet days, my osteoarthritis prevents me from much movement, but I discovered that I need to fight the urge not too move. At the very least, I should walk more (Others with cerebral palsy have warned me of the urge to be stagnated and not wishing to move more). I am trying, but I find it tiring and frustrating. Still, I must prod on and keep moving. Perhaps the coming warmer temperatures will help motivate me. I should at least try a little bit every day.

I guess that’s good advice for anyone, “Keep moving people.”
—Robert Confiant 29 January 2019

Little changes and lifetime habits

I was out with my partner last night to catch the play Beautiful: The Carole King Musical at the Queen Elizabeth Theatre. We walked, mainly uphill, from the SkyTrain station to the theatre (Something that nearly did me in – energy wise). This morning, I decided to do something about it.

For me, diets and dieting do not work. They never have. I lose weight for awhile and then slowly gain most, if not all, the weight back. I figured there has to be another way. I have decided to try a new way. It will be slower, but I think it could be more lasting. I haven’t gain weight, but I haven’t lost any either and this is imperative at this point in my life.

health-and-fitness

I am going to make a lifestyle change. I will start off small with little changes. Dependent on what study one reads, a habit can take anywhere from 66 days to 2541 days to become established. How much better would it be if one just made it a lifestyle change?

I have cut back on my drinking. As anyone who knows me knows, I love my beer. To be honest, I would have one or two a day after work and more if the day was stressful, and I would drink minimum a six pack on the weekends. All that changed this week. I haven’t had any. Frankly, it been a long time coming. Consciously or sub-consciously, I realized that my health was struggling; not so much the weight thing, but the walking part. I am out of shape. Last night, we the “Eureka” moment – the final nail in the coffin that I could no longer deny.

A few weeks ago, I switched to light beer and I cut back. I just decided one day that if I wanted to drink beer, then that is what I had to do. In-fact, I haven’t had one all week this week, so that is something. I don’t miss it.

The next phase will be more difficult, but I will need to do it. Incorporate more greens in my diet. I don’t mind fruit and some vegetables, but I really do not care for salads. My partner, unfortunately for me, feels the same about salads as I do. Sure, I eat them if I eat out at a restaurant sometimes, but if I buy the stuff and try to eat it at home, then most of it goes into the waste can. Salads are not the only difficult part. I need to get back into moving more. I am finding this difficult. My knees and hips are shot. I don’t notice it as much in the summer months, but in these fall and winter months. I am feeling more pain with my arthritis at this time of year. I have decided that since I cannot yet walk uphill without great difficulty. I can walk downhill okay. I may not start at a fast pace and I may not do so every day at first, but I can start.

Every morning, pretty much, I end up waiting 5 to 10 minutes for a shuttle bus to take me to the nearest SkyTrain station. This is the time that I could walk to the station. It may take me longer at first, but eventually I would be able to walk it that amount of time, so I will. I am promising myself that I will do so at least twice a week and then build up from there once it gets easier. It is not much, but it is definitely a start. At least, it is better than no walking.

Little changes.

—Robert Confiant 17 November 2018

1. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Habit, Habit.

I gained my weight back and I’m pissed off at myself

I gained my weight back and I’m pissed off at myself; that’s okay, piss off is good. It helps get me motivated for change.

I never started gaining weight until I was sixteen. By my early twenties, I started to realize I was putting on pounds – I still did nothing about it (I should have done something then I guess, but hindsight is twenty-twenty vision).

By my early forties, I stated the “diet thing.” My weight went down, then slowly back up. For ten years, I played the “diet game.”

dieting

It happened again, I gained the weight. It been a difficult last three years, or so. My Cerebral Palsy, aging and premature aging in the form of: tiredness, aches, osteoarthritis; plus, my lack of drive and energy. My work environment became a huge issue as well.

Due to circumstances, which were unexpected, we have been short-handed at work. A lot of it fell on my shoulders (I don’t handle stress well. Especially, when the stress is over a long period of time). I drank and ate a lot to compensate my emotional state.

Last week, it hit me that I gained all the weigh I had lost from my Toronto days. I am determined to loss 40 – 50 pounds. I still will be over weight, but I won’t be obese. I am not young, and I don’t believe the BMI is a valid measurement of health and I won’t be doing a diet. They don’t work in the long term. I need to learn new eating habits and to make these changes a life style routine.

I will get there. It will just take time, but I am in no rush, and I will probably fail a few times; however, I am determined to stay the course.
—Robert Confiant 29 April 2018